One couple was in therapy because neither one of them enjoyed sex or ever had an orgasm. This lazy panda forgot to write something about itself. Me: It shouldn't be affecting you after this long. “But there was a toilet in there, so I didn’t need this after all.”, I can picture the nurse facepalming in my head. The day after I had surgery on my leg, a nurse came into my hospital room with a box in her hand. It wasn't until I was in the doctor's office that I noticed that it had exactly the same pattern as the inlet cover on our jacuzzi. Patient: Doctor, I slipped in the grocery store and really hurt myself. I mention this, to which they reply "yeah but it grew back. Was doing surgery on a 19 year old who tested positive for meth and cocaine who was grilling the anesthesiologist about every drug we were going to use in surgery because "he doesn't like putting chemicals in his body"Gotta stick with that organic, fair trade, Non-GMO cocaine. Paramedic here. I had a Marine come in because he swallowed a rock. Carver is a maternal fetal medicine specialist. A 32 year old grown man asked me if the hot spells he was experiencing at night meant he was going through menopause. She explained that he washed the condom with hot water and soap before he used said condom again.. Both virgins untill married at 26 and 27. Feeling some pressure “back there”, I reached down and patted the doctor on the head. Answered the bed alarm for a 90 year old this evening. A doctor recognized me and came over to talk. I smelled alcohol on his breath so I asked the guy if he had been drinking and he looked me directly in the eye and said, "Nooooo". "Me too, lady. However, as far as the potential for awkward situations goes, going to the doc's can be comedy gold. “In my field of physical medicine and rehabilitation, we use the knowledge of biology, biomechanics, physics and even psychology to help people achieve the highest quality of life, despite a variety of challenges. A literary scholar teaching in a medical school, Montgomery was an outsider, a self-described “licensed trespasser in clinical territory” , who cast a keen yet compassionate eye on medical learning and practice. You can always call and ask for clarification when you need it. ""...you've had 20 heart attacks?? Specials Revolution of the Daleks Series 12 The Timeless Children Series 12 Ascension of the Cybermen Series 12 The Haunting of Villa Diodati Series 12 Can You Hear Me? It started when she was 11. "She and not used her feminine deodorant spray; she had instead accidentally used her daughter's glitter hairspray. Come on... even a dog knows how to reproduce!!!! To his light tap at a chamber door a woman's voice said,--"Come in." Generally considered the best multi-Doctor story even now, "The Five Doctors" was a celebration of Doctor Who's 20th anniversary. You haven’t examined him yet.”. Very cut class accent. “Oh,” she said, nodding. Doc here. Turns out her family would bring her fast food for every meal and hide it in the side table. Is The Good Doctor based on a true story? Patient was fine. Apparently I also saw a picture of my throat and asked if it was a dinosaur. I’m reviewing the surgical checklist with the nurses.Me: We have the surgical equipment, the heart-lung machine, antibiotics, and the replacement heart valve on hand. Told him after the surgery, and he told us "no, my tendons are all torn. “Ah, Dr Jones, a meeting of the minds,” he said, laughing it off. Awesome. I developed a similar bump on the top of my foot. I know my body. Share this: Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window) At which point she interrupts me and says, "Oh that isn’t chocolate milk. They had an Amish couple come in, saying that the wife couldn't get pregnant. I took care of an 11 year old boy in the ER a little while back. If you can't stop making them cry, make them laugh. K. yeah right, leave the "medication" out of it. A Black physician died of Covid-19 weeks after she described a White doctor dismissing her pain and concerns about her treatment as she lay in … Some of the patients and their families asked incredible things of me, such as putting brains back inside after an explosion took half the head off, but I have never been as incredulous as when I had to explain "wrong hole" to a very old tribal elder who was wondering why he couldn't father any children. I am a family doctor in Castlegar and on Nov. 28 I was diagnosed with … Why is it important to note that he was Asian? hate these kind of people. Another person already submitted the same fake story. For the men and women who dedicate themselves to the pursuits of wellness, research and compassion for others, medicine is a calling. I feel like our doctors should not assists those couples to have children. Flickr / Jennifer Morrow. Apparently the first semester midterm results were in, and her son failed them all, because he couldn't see the board in his classes and needs glasses! ""I was hungry.". One could also say that it is an adventure story, because for the protagonist the visit to the doctor had a lot of emotion. I wanted to help people. Osborne is an assistant professor of surgery and an associate program director of vascular surgery. With Howard E. Rollins Jr., Art Carney, Charles Kimbrough, Jodi Thelen. “Don’t worry about a thing,” he assured me. I mean, they did sleep with each other every night. I was intubated for a severe attack a few times. Close Filter . I gave him ketamine for a fracture reduction, or in other words setting and splinting of a broken bone. It was unfortunate. Not a doctor, but I WAS a corpsman in the Navy. A gentleman calls our office with questions about an upcoming test he is scheduled for, and we talk at length about the procedure. I've had a patient claim that amputations run in his family.He said that was the only reason he needed both legs taken off above the knee. At least not before a spay or neuter. ", I wonder what drugs where involved in this. She wanted to go out for a smoke so I did the whole pregnancy and smoking spiel, she stopped me and told me I knew nothing as the baby would be harmed if she stopped smoking straight away. Patient: Aisle six. There's a story behind every application. Was at a urologist in a hospital and there were a couple of power cuts. "I have been interested in a career in women's health since college and I began medical school here at the University of Michigan with plans to become a OBGYN. Not a doctor but work in pharmacy. I felt like neonatology would be the best opportunity for me to help other families in a meaningful way as they became parents.”. 'The whole recovery room just fell about laughing. I had a patient come in for an STD check. I'm a rural family doc doing locums and was working at a city family practice clinic when I saw this patient.21 y/o female, not overweight, in no distress and appears quite wellMe: "so what brings you in today"Pt: "I'm pretty sure I had a heart attack"Me: "okay, tell me more about why you feel that. They immigrated to the U.S. when I was very young, and dad spent most of the next decade repeating his residency training as a surgical specialist. Please check link and try again. Could not be convinced otherwise. Don’t break the rules during Christmas, pleads B.C. When I went to the ER to have a painful ingrown toenail removed, I was sobbing, gagging, petrified … the works. A well dressed man came in with his 8 year old, healthy looking, son. She giggled and said she'd be rich if she had a pound for every time it happened. At some point one of them said something like, "We've got to get back in there and deal with an unconscious patient." The incredibly strong and resilient young adults I work with every day are why I became a doctor.”. Pharmacist, but comment still relates.Had a lady call in complaining that their husbands viagra wasn't working. “What’s the bad news?” I asked. Never removed them, not even during night time. He had to stop a minute to regain his composure. When I went to the ER to have a painful ingrown toenail removed, I was sobbing, gagging, petrified … the works. Despite the stress, long hours away from home and family, I could never imagine a different career.”. Because it is based on a true story it is a quite personalized story in its origin. In a puddle of her husbands pee. Not a doctor but I'm a nurse who worked in the OR at a trauma center. Direct ways included shadowing him at work and incorporating me into his research laboratory as a preteen and adolescent. I asked a patient complaining of dizziness if she had ever been diagnosed with "vertigo". The most outrageous thing I've heard was from a boy who was something like 20-22 years old. Each time we would have to explain a long update to every single one of them because they "are entitled to hear it from a doctor".One of these stories being sitting down and explaining why you don't give gatorade as an IV drip. Funny and innocent. The Ninth Doctor was portrayed by Christopher Eccleston in 2005. This might have pissed off the doctor. She is also director of cardiothoracic radiology and chair of the Radiology Service Excellence Program. “I became a doctor because I enjoy caring for people. Patient: Thank you very much, Clara Fication! She sat in the waiting room for over an hour with that thing in there. "Yes but gatorade has more electrolytes. Luckily she didn't remember it. You're not more sick after you quit. WHERE??? I had an 8 year old kid in the OR say "You mother fu*kers!" Not the guy who is desperate/who can't face his HIV/ who lake of knowledge/who trust a witch, but the f***** monsters that take advantage of weak people and risking their life/are responsible for their death. We are writers, directors and producers. If she doesn't know the answer to a problem, she will send you to someone who does. As I leaned in to check her eyes, my older patient got a little frisky.“You remind me of my third husband,” she said coyly.“Third husband?” I asked. He paused a second, then thanked me. Apparently the itch was in his spleen because that thing was deep. Proceeds to name at least 10 medications. Playing Doctor From: [email protected] (Sam) When I was 12 years, three friends (2 girls and another boy)and I were in Alice's room on a Saturday morning around 9:30 playing doctor. I suggest maybe easing up on the cocaine. Kazerooni is a professor of radiology, and associate chair for clinical affairs. As early as elementary school, I developed a love for math and science. Procreation (and preventing it) and the human body are so important and complex, it's really not something one should kinda pick up by themselves. My youngest brother was born with a serious birth defect called occipital encephalocele. I feel fortunate that I come home feeling happy and fulfilled many more days than not and live each day with the satisfaction that comes from knowing that I have made a difference in the lives of others.”. They were really a bizarre couple. "Continues for two hours. I have a ganglion cyst on the inside of my wrist, when it starts getting large I smash my wrist down on a hard table and it goes away. At this point they returned to professional duties. I proceed to drop some dye in her eyes to check them in a microscope, and when I do I realize she's wearing contacts.She didn't like her natural eye colour, so she had bought a set of blue coloured lenses 8 months earlier. ""Oh, I have a degenerative neuromuscular condition. A doctor who is paying attention to high-stakes story crafting like that learns just how much stories matter. Every day, it’s a gift to have the opportunity to care for patients in their most vulnerable times. “Fleet enema. And I also wanted her to go around saying it to other people. Anyhow I'm at the computer going over some admission questions with him and his 10 family members who are crowded in the room with him. They're used for many pain pgt patients who have Multiple sclerosis there's one called marinol, Not a doctor but my dad is an opthamologist (eye doctor). An older lady was brought into the ED barely conscious by her husband. It took me some effort to keep a straight face, but we eventually resolved the problem and she stopped getting UTIs. “A 30-year career in medicine has taught me that understanding what makes one excited about getting up and going to work each morning is perhaps the most important consideration when choosing a career. It took time to figure out that a really good mentor takes at least as much pride in their mentee’s achievements as their own. My friend is a student doctor and is on placement at a small town doctor's office. ", It was 3am and I'd been on duty in the Emergency since 8am. Do you have any sores or anything?" Turns out she didn't know plain rolled oats were a thing. If you are a medical student or resident and would like to participate in an Inspiring Stories interview, please contact AspiringDocs@aamc.org for … "I'm the fourth generation of doctors in my family. My patient announced she had good news … and bad. Heard this story from a nurse friend.Some guy was dancing in skin tight leather pants at the opening of a new nightclub in a nearby small city. “The journey to becoming a physician has now taken me full-circle. I am a manager in a HCO and had a patient come into my office vehemently complaining about his doctor. Surgeon here. There was one who was very upset to find out that she was pregnant again because she'd used her diaphragm EXACTLY as she'd been told. Then I just start letting it all out over the floor. She thought the breastfeeding clinic meant plain oatmeal cookies. My dad said he couldn't stop laughing because I wouldn't leave without them. Bored Panda works best if you switch to our Android app. we all know that a pregnant teenagers know everyting. Doctor Who is a British television science fiction series, produced and screened by the BBC on the BBC TV channel from 1963 to 1964, and on BBC1 (later BBC One) from 1964 to 1989 and since 2005. An older lady was brought into the ED barely conscious by her husband. He explained his doctor referred him to another service and he was quite … A woman came in for a baby check with her 6-month-old and she had what looked like chocolate milk in the baby’s bottle. Trying not to burst out laughing, I said "Your daughter's scrotum?" An outbreak has killed one, infected 43 at California hospital. I was just laying there on my side blowing chunks with the needle still stuck in my ass. This lady had a mild goitre, and her reason for not quitting was that if she quit smoking the 'lumps in my neck would turn to cancer'. Weiner is an associate professor of neonatal-perinatal medicine, and the director of the Neonatal-Perinatal Medicine Training Program. He needed medical attention ... from the psychiatrist! Apparently they had been raised in some religious fundamentalist cult and didn’t understand how sex worked. Answered the bed alarm for a 90 year old this evening.Nurse: "Where are you going? Me: is there any chance you could be pregnant? Nursing student, that's not youth. this is what happen when you don't send your kid to sex ed in school. Some years prior she had sustained a gunshot wound to the frontal area, damaging the underside of one of her frontal lobes and severing an optic nerve to one of her eyes, as well as some of the muscles that rotated that eyeball. It wasn't one of my finer experiences at the doctor. “Are you ready for this?” “What is it?” I asked. The pieces just didn't add up and so I started questioning him more closely.Me: Do you use any drugs? Then, try to answer the questions about the story. what does this pain feel like"Pt: "like a heart attack"Me: "oh I see. A male patient inyected kitchen oil into his own cheeks because he saw a plastic surgery tv show where a surgeon inyected something similar to a model, then he was amazed that the bumps of the oil didnt go away and were turning red and painful af. Concerned, she demanded that he test her husband for it too. Today, the patient is well. Once she was stable we did some teaching and kept her for a few days for observation. This story story took a very uexpected and sudden turn. We respect your privacy. "I first became interested in medicine when I was a child. “I became a pediatric and fetal surgeon because I love children and I had amazing and inspirational mentors. As far back as I can remember, I knew I was going to be a doctor. I was intubated for a severe attack a few times. Article by USZINE -Funny , Humor, Lol Articles. Which he had just been bathing in. Progressing through my assessment she further divulged that even if he was sleeping with other people it shouldn't matter "because he uses a condom every time and he makes sure to wash it throughly after every use." Umm, why are you in a wheelchair? After the procedure was finished and post-op instructions we given, the man asked, "So when should I expect my new teeth to grow in?" If you don't love your child enough to say no, why have children? Recently, Michigan Medicine asked some of its practitioners from varying disciplines to share their personal experiences and influences that led them into the profession. I had a guy with an ICD in place. Not a doctor, but I regularly have people come in for eye examinations because 'when I take my glasses of things are blurry'. She gagged, we removed the tube, she smacked her lips and said loudly, in her incredible accent:'That's the best bit of cock I have had in years! ", 'Put him back- he doesn't go outside often' lol, "I have the Ebola". Ophthalmologist here. Social stories are a research-based tool used to help children prepare for real-life events. Turns out the woman had been in a hetero relationship for a few years and never got pregnant despite using no protection. “Are you ready for this?”. The patient did not believe that cancer cells and regular cells would have the same frequency.Another patient insisted that his cancer had been properly treated at home with baking soda (he gave me a website like phkillscancer.com or something). The room was small, and furnished in the … “I hope so too,” my husband replies, answering from behind a magazine. 7 thoughts on “ Playing Doctor – True Stories from Childhood ” ThePrince March 24, 2011 at 12:08 pm. I am an ER doc. Pandey is an associate professor of neurosurgery and radiology. The patient also had with them a surgery report in which it appears their baking soda consumption resulted in buildup of abnormal calcium in the wall of the stomach, which had to be removed. Error occurred when generating embed. yes... ask the guy who try to cure his cancer with vegetable, The doctor explained to his patient that she suffered from inflammation of the cervix. I work for an optometrist and it was the month before school started and a woman brought in her son to have his eyes checked for the first time. This piece was originally published in Pulse — voices from the heart of medicine . Amputations might have indeed 'ran' in the family if they all had the same health habits, or lack thereof... Im ashamed to say I have a story that fits here. He noticed that his mother had helped herself to some of the 'treats' prepared the night before.The son, the apple of his parents eye, had to then explain to his father and the doctor that the treats she had enjoyed were space cakes. I'm a med student but I once saw a patient in the ER who came in because she lost her vibrator inside herself. Sorry but that isn't how it works. The bond between children with neurological disorders, their families and the doctor makes it a very fulfilling field.". Read about some of the inspiring journeys others have made from applicant to medical student to physician. Said she and her partner had been trying to conceive for like five years and had "tried everything." Patient was fine. He's confused not only about how tampons work but where urine comes from... Had to explain to an adult you have to brush all the sides of a teeth. Said every boy pet ever- upon waking up after trip to the the vet. Read about some of the inspiring journeys others have made from applicant to medical student to physician. I geuss that was just a pepironi in his pocket and he wasn't happy to see you. “Being a physician provides innumerable opportunities and the immense privilege to help better the lives of patients of all ages. We will not publish or share your email address in any way. William Hartnell's death meant "The Five Doctors… Had a woman who was in active labor, despite insisting she couldn't be pregnant. You can read more about it and change your preferences. story continues below Varshavski—who was crowned People 's "sexiest doctor alive" in 2015—has issued regular pleas on TV and social media for people to cover up. On further question it transpired that four times a day he was spraying the dogs coat with the ventolin inhaler. Moving onto the frontline: A doctor’s story Dr. Sterling Malish moved from the East Coast just in time for a coronavirus surge. "I went to sleep and woke up with holes in my underwear that weren't there last night.". … Doctor Mike on YouTube, Dr. Cedric “Jamie” Rutland on Instagram and YouTube, Dr. Esther Choo on Twitter and Dr. Rose Marie Leslie and Dr. Jennifer Lincoln on … Aw you guys are great". I then get really confused and tired afterwards, and I can't remember much of anything that happens to me until I take a nice long nap. I explained that everyone develops presbyopia eventually. In my mind it’s more a lack of sense and logic. She said her last period was "like ten months ago" so she'd gone through menopause. He changed his clothes and went directly to the surgery block. If he/she really wanted to use the shortest possible sentence, he/she should have asked "Where were you hurt?". Me: Years? Bradford is the executive vice dean for academic affairs at Michigan Medicine and the Charles J. Krause, M.D., Collegiate Professor of Otolaryngology. The patient just stared at me. Arizona patient stories. The story was written in Yalta and had been completed by 11 November 1898. Reply ↓ HUMOR_ME_NOW March 24, 2011 at 1:53 pm. He gets weird cases all the time. “The medicine for my earache worked,” she said. Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's, We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide, social media features, and analyze our traffic. Getting a physical around 11-13 and the doctor who was probably around 75 at the time asks me to strip down to my boxers for the whole awkward ball grab thing. "We explain why.Son frowns. Me: Where did you get hurt? Fuyuhiko Date (ダテ フユヒコ Date Fuyuhiko), better known as the Doctor (ドクター Dokutā), is the primary antagonist of Cave Story. “Being a doctor was, for me, the ultimate opportunity to help others. I asked about all the normal stuff, and she claimed to have no idea why she had this eye problem - she had never had anything wrong with her eyes. The surgeon mumbled, “Yes. Apparently the cook had convinced him that eating raw corn was poisonous or something. So then they gave him a cup and asked him for a semen sample. a too bad fart smell actually could means health problems. I see some crazy stuff, but one thing that stands out was the time I was admitting a guy to the hospital. Click here to view. "Told a lady she was pregnant. ""......Uhhhhh, ok......What does it feel like when you have a heart attack? Oh, wait, our insurance companies do that, too. And type 2 diabetes.". Directed by Peter Levin. I went to the doctor to treat my soar throat and I agreed to get a shot of penicillin. The boy had a bad case of tonsilitis and refused to take any meds because all he needed to do was "bite the sun". (To Asian doctor.) I once had a 20 year old and his girlfriend come in at 2 am freaking out becuase "something had tore his throat open". Patient: You wait until now to figure this stuff out?